Why Smart Women May Scare Men

I was fortunate to have been interviewed by Leslie Mann, a reporter for the Chicago Tribune, for an article about a study done on young men ages 18-22 which stated that men like smart women, but from a distance.

To read the full article in its original form, click here.

The article explains the study conducted by Lora Park, associate professor of psychology at the University at Buffalo which seemed to conclude that young men tend to like smart women, but from a distance.

During the interview, I was asked for my opinion on this study and whether smart women scare men. I explained the different between masculine and feminine energy– masculine energy exudes assertiveness, self-reliant, analytical, take charge, and dominant energy, while feminine energy is more loving, intuitive, compassionate, spiritual, nurturing and receptive.

The parts of the interview that did not make it into the article, essentially explained how intelligent women may intimidate men during the dating process, if the woman leads with her masculine energy.

Many successful, smart, professional women are so accomplished because they utilize the characteristics typically associated with masculine energy to get ahead in the workplace. They are competitive, driven, ambitious, goal-oriented, have a take charge attitude and may even be in leadership roles.

These are very admirable for getting ahead in the professional realm; however, many women take this conditioning and lead with their successes when dating men, thinking that it will impress them. While most men adore smart women and in fact DESIRE a smart woman for a quality relationship, when a woman’s predominant state in all areas of life is more on the masculine side, she may appear to be competing with the man in her life.

When both people in the relationship are in their masculine, it may cause the man to feel he is in competition with her, which can lead to feelings of diminished masculinity on his part and ultimately decreased attraction.

The reason for this may be due to fear of rejection by a higher quality woman, feeling like he isn’t good enough for her (inadequacy and emasculation). Most men want more emotional safety, to feel like he is needed, respected and appreciated. They want to feel valued and irreplaceable.

Balancing the Masculine and the Feminine Energies

I cannot stress enough how attractive a smart, intelligent and successful woman really is and in no way would I ever suggest a woman to down-play her intelligence for fear that it may make a man feel “less than.” For the women reading this, by all means, embrace your intelligence and accomplishments! Forge ahead in your career with your ambitious, take-charge, assertive attitude.

All I suggest is that when you are outside of the work place, and especially when interacting with the man in your life (or a new date), tap more into your warm, loving, sensitive, and nurturing feminine energy. An alpha male deeply desires a feminine woman who is in touch with her emotions, is intuitive and compassionate.

After a long day at work, men want to come home and feel the warmth from the woman in their life. A strong woman in her feminine energy is extremely inviting and feels so comforting to be around.

So by all means, utilize your intelligence and accomplishments to get far in your career– just make sure to tap into your femininity as well, especially when it comes to relationships and dating men.

If you need guidance on how to embrace your feminine energy, schedule a free call and we’ll discuss how we can work together to bring forth your brilliant femininity.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this article. Please comment, share, or like :)

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